why ask why me?

Monday, July 31, 2006

call them fish, call them frogs, i just want a decent one to call

i read

i read A LOT

i can read an entire book in one sitting

my friends know i love to read, so they are constantly finding books for me on the bargain table

best friend heard about this book, "you have to kiss a lot of frogs" so she bought it for me. she also got me the follow up "looking for mr. good frog"

she says, they are about a single jewish girl, looking for love - just like you

gee - thanks for the reminder BF

so i sit down... and i start reading... and i read.. and i read some more..

and i have to agree, at times this is funny, at times sad, at times similar, at times a heck of a lot worse than what i have experienced

and THEN the author/main character is older then me

WHY WOULD ANYONE GIVE ME NOT JUST ONE, but TWO books about a single woman who is STILL SINGLE in her 40's!?!?!?!?


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Sunday, July 30, 2006

blog updates

i don't feel like posting today, but i did want to do some updates...

so check out the new additions to my side bar..

a few new friends have moved into the bloggerhood...we now have hockey & football joining baseball..... some blogs that are great reads but will probably never be "blog friends" so they are in their own bloggerhood

and as i add more i'll let you all know

Saturday, July 29, 2006

Garden State

well, since yesterday's post went over so well, i have decided to give a 2nd review:

AGAIN - THIS MAY GIVE AWAY INFO - or it may not.. it depends on where my rambling leads.

in college, i took a cinema theory class. basically this was a 3 hour class where we watched old "critical" movies and then we were lectured about the film

the only thing i ever took away from this class was: if one person has 3 jobs in a film: don't watch it

well, zach braff proved this professor right: he wrote, directed AND "starred" in this film

yeah, there were a couple "deep" scenes, and a few good lines - but other wise, another WASTE OF TIME

ALSO - it was another example of natalie portman being too strong of an actress for the role - i HATE when this happens


Thursday, July 27, 2006

AVP: Alien Vs. Predator

do not read if you don't know what happened!!!

ok, so, i admit, i may have been the last human on earth to watch AVP, but i finally gave in and watched it - i've only had it on my dvr for a month....

i am all about chicks kicking ass - and if i had known that this was what happened i would have watched sooner...

i love action movies

but SERIOUSLY - i will NEVER get that 90 minutes back

i cannot believe that this movie made as much money as it did - however i do see why there is talk of a sequal.... and yeah, i'll even waste another 90 minutes watching it too...

but next time - let me know how dumb the plot is......


Tuesday, July 25, 2006

a few quite days

i am happy that i feel peace

but there is something running underneath

a therapist would say that i am projecting my fears of future failure

my mother would say i am a worry-wart

i am trying to take it one day at a time

i am going to try to enjoy the rest of this week

i am going to continue to take time for me

Saturday, July 22, 2006

This week's 7's

i was supposed to go out with the girls last night - they ditched me...

i was supposed to go out with a "new" guy tonight - but he "is feeling under the weather"

so, i have decided to dedicate tonight to all the guys in my past who have, for better or worse, helped mold me into who i am - and the 7 worst lines that have ever been said to me



I would like to take this moment to say thank you all for helping me get 1000 hits... last night i was at something like 983 vistors.. i woke up and was at 1029


Friday, July 21, 2006



Some dumbass sent me this popup!

I am posting it for ALL because forewarned is forearmed - NOW WE CAN DATE SAFELY!!!!

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"The 5 things in my" mememememe

(stolen from a random blog)

In my purse
phone, keys, cherry softlips, wallet, lucky doubloon

In my fridge
water bottles for the gym, strawberries, bottle of wine, bag of lettuce, single serving sirloin thawing

In my car
puppers blanket, empty water bottles from the gym, my bike, my roller blades, laundry detergent

In my medicine cabinet
bandaids, witch hazel, 3 types of dental floss, tums ex, eye makeup remover

In my mp3 player
AC/DC - Back in Black
Linkin Park - Hybrid Theory
Bush - sixteen stone
Christina Aguilera - stripped
Heart - Heart


Thursday, July 20, 2006

For Research Sake

his motives may be to separate himself from bush, but for once you've got to give arnold schwarzenegger a LITTLE credit: he understands the importance of stem-cell research

now THAT is IRONY my friends


Something's Gotta Give

now, typically songs interest me and i sing along with them but i don't usually internalize them..... but this one is SO TOTALLY MY LIFE RIGHT NOW! it literally describes my dating fiascos this past month ~ hence i will waste space and post the lyrics! (ok, but i have a dog - and only 30 candles will be on my cake next year) and i am putting a (short term) moratorium on dating for the rest of this month.... (well, maybe)

off to the gym!!!!

Artist: Leann Rimes
Album: This Woman
Title: Something's Gotta Give

Jenny's got a job, a cat named Jake,
31 candles on her birthday cake
Next year

Thought by now she'd have a man
Two car seats and a minivan
But it still ain't here (hey!)

She's been lookin' for Mr. Right so long
But all she's found is Mr. Wrong
That's the pitts

She's drawn a line that she won't cross
Her and time are facing off
She says something's gotta give

Something's gotta give me butterflies
Something's gotta make me feel alive
Something's gotta give me dreams at night
Something's gotta make me feel alright
I don't know where it is
But something's gotta give

Friday night she had a date
Cell phone junky a half hour late
That's the biz baby

She's riding out the twists of fate
She's had all that she can take
She says something's gotta give

(repeat chorus)

I swear
There's got to be a meant to be for me out there
Somewhere someday
I'm gonna find someone, somehow, someway

Jenny's got a job, a cat named Jake,
31 candles on her birthday cake
Next year

She thought by now she'd have a man
Two car seats and a minivan
She says something's got,
Something's got,
Something's gotta


Wednesday, July 19, 2006


once again, i am embarrassed that bush is "my" president.

i AM A DEMOCRAT - but regardless of my political views, i understand the value of scientific research.

but what does this great countries "leader" do - he FINALLY vetos a bill that could help millions be free from horrid diseases.

he obviously has NEVER met anyone who suffers from Parkinsons, alzhimers, or any other debilitating disease or disorder.

even sadder are the "hurd of cattle" who would follow him to the slaughter who didn't vote to override this veto. They too must not have a family member who has ever suffered from any of the above.

the stem cell lines that are usable have brought us SO MUCH information that has HELPED...but the opportunity for new lines that would broaden this research would help researchers SO MUCH MORE!!!

now, don't get me wrong - i DON'T think that this should be a free for all... but we need to open our eyes to what could be a positive for ALL OF US...

i KNOW i am going to piss a lot of people off with this as it is a "hot topic" issue - i am NOT going to debate you about when life starts...

however,i HAVE seen the devastation these diseases cause first hand - it is NOT pretty... and what is even uglier is that the research is there, showing us the way to, if not a cure, a way to improve these lives... but once again - a door has been slammed shut on progress

so, the next time you have the opportunity to vote - think about all who COULD be helped by taking a risk with controversial research - this isn't a religious issue, it is an ethical and PERSONALLY MORALLY RIGHT issue


Tuesday, July 18, 2006

Gym / Cell Phone Etiquette

I remember a while ago a fellow blogger posted about cell phone etiquette - again, (i am almost positive) this needs to be attributed to "just some guy" but i'm not hunting down the post to link it right now...

well, i found a new inappropriate place for the cell phone...

i found it quite annoying that the chick running FULL OUT for 30 minutes was TEXT MESSAGING THE ENTIRE TIME

ok - i just needed to voice that annoyance...


i'm BACK....... but not better than ever - YET

so, feeling as uncomfortable as i was last week - i decided to take off & leave town for a few days to think... and here is where i am at

i really like the school i teach at....i get along well with coworkers... most of the parents leave us alone - and when we DO contact each other, we seem to be in agreement....

but i am not happy with my life outside of school...so, off to figure out the rest of my life....outside of work (i think the biggest thing is that i will spend this school year being the best i can as a teacher, but outside of school i will be working on figuring out what i need to do to get hired in another state - certification requirements)

i want to thank those of you who left some great thoughts both on & off the blog regarding personal purpose... and "just some guy", thanks for the link!
so, how interesting that on my day back, this was my horridscope:

Genuine satisfaction is the result of profound self-knowledge. Once you truly understand who you are and how you operate, you can make decisions that meet all your needs in a healthy and growth-oriented way.

so i have decided to reevaluate and shift my summer introspection goal from finding my "purpose" to understanding who i am & how i operate.......

Wish Me Luck!!!

Wednesday, July 12, 2006

Wednesday w/ Q. G.

I decided that today I was going to read the news and then write something here that showed my intelligent side.

And then I read the news.

I KNOW that the real world is all about terrorism, and murder, and fighting for human rights. I also know that people do "crazy" things like the Dr. in NYC who blew up his building, or that "accidents" happen like the deadly accident in Boston's big dig.
And the rest of the news was about sports. Don't get me wrong - I LOVE sports. I have fun watching them, playing them, and talking shit like the next fan...

But it just pushed my buttons a little to much today.

Why don't we ever see front page headlines about good things and people?

Why is it SO IMPORTANT that we KNOW that ball players are doing steroids (I know - they are illegal - but still: front page?) And WHO CARES about TomKat & Suri's birth certificate!!! (note - this is NOT worthy of a link!)

So I turned off my lap top, turned off the TV, put away the newspaper, piled the news magazines... And picked up a book.

But what was under the book is what I found so thought provoking.

I found a page-a-day calendar that a student (ok, her mom) gave me last winter (better than an apple). So I looked at all the pages I had to pull off, and found some funny jokes, some interesting stories, some useless information.

And then I read this:

"So many people walk around with a meaningless life. The seem half asleep, even when they're busy doing things they think are important. This is because they're chasing the wrong things. The way you get meaning into your life is to devote yourself to loving others, devote yourself to your community around you, and devote yourself to creating something that gives you purpose and meaning."

--- Morrie Schwarts from Tuesdays with Morrie by Mitch Albom

It got me thinking about how much I take for granted everyday. I live in a relatively safe area. I have friends. I have family. I have my health. I have a job. I have a pet. I have my own vehicle.

I then started thinking about how I devote myself to others. I do this, sometimes to the detriment of myself. I am always offering my assistance. I am the one everyone calls when help is needed - a ride, information, child care, etc... AND I SAY YES.

Then I thought about how I devote myself to my community. I participate in various charity events. I donate time and money to other causes. I have, over many years, given of my time to special olympic sports. I helped w/ a habitat house. I have done adopt-a-highway - orange vest and all. I also know I could do more.

But I realized, I still haven't found something that gives me purpose and meaning once I step away from these activities. So, for the rest of the summer, my goal is to find something that does.

My question to you is: Do you know what it is in your life that gives you purpose and meaning?

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Tuesday, July 11, 2006

Gym Rats

So, i dragged ass to the gym tonight.....(well, i went last night too, but i pussed out and did a half workout)... and i did my WHOLE workout

And for those of you who have been pestering me about "trainer": i think he has moved on to younger pastures - she MIGHT be legal.... so that made my 20 minute consultation go much smoother...

He wishes i would stick to a more "constant" schedule w/ the lifting... But sheesh, last week was a holiday and the gym was CLOSED on the 4th..... ok, so last week i did slack a bit....but in 2 days i have gone twice... and i AM getting stronger... and i AM loosing weight..............YEAH ME.......

As for the pool..... the dirty old men are STILL staring at me! So today i stood there and stared back. They kept staring, but they did move away from my lane.... perverts

why can't i find a pervert who does something for me......... *sigh*


tired tuesdays

well, yesterday was as useless day.
today isn't looking much better.
i didn't sleep well.
i woke up w/ a belly ache.
i have no desire to do anything productive.

HOWEVER, i have done some work around here... check out my side bar & .....

My 7's column is now up & running, with this weeks new posting: 7 things i learned from my dad

keep sending those "7's" topic suggestions my way

future issues include: things i learned from my mom, & worst lines from guys (and some of these are GOOD, er, bad, er, well you get the drift)

Monday, July 10, 2006

Daily blahs

i've been feeling a bit off all day....

i woke up well rested, but i took a nap

i woke up again to the phone ringing, but i didn't answer it because i didn't recognize the number (do i know anyone named New Brunswick? Why would a town be calling me? more to the point, where is area code 506?)

i went to the coffee shop & got my fav bagel & a chi tea, but i didn't enjoy it OR get any studying done

i heard my cell phone ring, but again i didn't answer it because it is the older co-worker who i like spending time with - but NOT ALL THE TIME

i tried studying at home, but couldn't focus there either

i tried to watch bad tv, but i found it boring

i tried to read a book, but wasn't interested (this is always a key that something is wrong)

so i tried to study again, but no luck

i DID answer the phone when best friend called, but she annoyed me too to no end: she talked at me, not with me.... and i didn't like it

so now i am back home... for how long i don't know.... i am antsy... i am annoyed....

oh why can't i find joy today?

Sunday, July 09, 2006

Blog Crushes?

This post is based upon a VERY interesting phone conversation with a fellow blogger yesterday.

As you all can see I have no real identifiable information - I work in a public school in a very closed minded area. They could fire me for "moral" issues, and have done so for lesser reasons. Additionally, I value my privacy (but I LOVE e-mail.)

I had been lurking in the bloggerhood for a few weeks before I finally gave in and made my own blog. I then still lurked for a bit before I started posting & commenting. And then I came out of my shell, and I am even sarcastic in some of my comments. All of this with a "secret" e-mail and pseudonym.

So, fellow male blogger and I have been e-mailing each other for a couple of weeks. And yeah, a bit of innocent flirting has been going on. He has been trying to get me to call him for 2 weeks. I don't know why, but I gave him my number yesterday.

And he called.

And we talked. For an hour & a half.

He is funny, and smart, and just as charming on the phone as he has been in e-mail.

He then tells me, one of his girl friends thinks I have a blog crush on him. I thought about it and admitted, yeah - a little. He admitted the same.

So I spent most of the evening thinking about this phenomena. I have come to the following conclusions:

  • Blog crushes are safe
  • Blog crushes are fun
  • Blog crushes are easier to be yourself with than IRL crushes
  • Blog crushes take flirting in an entirely new direction

So, fellow bloggers - my questions to you:

  • Have you ever had a blog crush?
  • Have you ever or would you ever act upon said crush if the opportunity arose?
  • What are your overall thoughts on the topic?

I (we) can't wait to read your thoughts!

Saturday, July 08, 2006

My 1st 100's

A number of fellow bloggers have encouraged me to put up my 100's. I have decided to do so, but as a separate blog. You can link to it from here, or at any time, using My List Link under my Bloggerhood list and above my archives.


Old flames & "horrid"scopes

Now, I am a pretty down to earth girl. However, just for shits & giggles, I sometimes check out my horoscope. My ISP even provides a great homepage with lots of news options, and it posts the kooky thing there for me.

So imagine my surprise when I got home last night to find this on my computer: "Soulmate activity stirs. An old email or phone number suddenly turns up. Do you think it is time to make contact again?" and a message on my answering machine. Instead of listening to the message, I checked the caller ID box first and found none other than "turds" name w/ his number popping up on caller id!!!

And no, for all of you wondering if I caved, I did NOT call back. Nor will I. I deserve someone better than that. And I will find him - or he me...

I found it even more amusing when I was woken up to the sound of the Pussycat Dolls this morning singing "dontcha"- I then found it hilarious to hear "turd" apologizing and asking for another chance as I listened to the song! (I know I have moved on when I can wait 12 hours to listen to a message - YIPPI)

I admit, I am one sick chick... But my soulmate is out there. HE will get my humor. HE will appreciate my mind. HE will accept everything about me. And he won't have a reason to apoligze for being a turd as a way to get a second chance.

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new e-mail...er g-mail

Well, I have been subtly convinced that g-mail is the way to go... it keeps everything, it's accessable from anywhere, and it has chat too..

so from now on, if we have been e-mailing behind the scene, change my info in your contacts to whyaskwhyme@gmail.com

Friday, July 07, 2006

Loss of Freedom

Today I spent part of the afternoon with a friend from work. For whatever reason, she thinks I am "intuitive." This initially stems from me realizing that she was nervous on a day cruise we were on. Well, duh - she doesn't know how to swim and she got on a boat!

From there, she has asked me to hold her jewelry and tell her what I feel. Now, I love her with all my heart, but seriously??? But I did it - using my knowledge of jewelry and my knowledge of how guys gift.

So anyway, we went on a short trip @ 50 miles out of town. To get there, we have to go over a bridge over part of a lake.

No biggie... Well actually yeah, biggie.

I hate bridges.

I hate heights.

So, we get to the bridge and she starts rambling on about who knows, because all I can hear is static in my ears as I focus with all I have. We are on the bridge, there is a lot of traffic, and it is windy. And she looks at me and sees me and says: You are afraid!


From there we went into a discussion about fears. She is afraid of tunnels and dying in them. I admit, that I have experienced trepidation when I can't see light at either end of them. But I never was too worried.

Did she have to bring up tunnels?

I get home, and what is the first news story?

A terrorist plot to set off explosives in the PATH railway tunnels under the Hudson River in October or November was disrupted in its planning stages, and several suspects in the plot have been apprehended, law enforcement officials said today. (NYTimes Online)

Great. Ok, so they got the bad guys - this time.

Now, I try to not base my life on my fears - but this one got to me, since I am going to be in the NYC area in a month.

I miss the innocence of youth.

I hope that someday, we can find a little bit of it again.


Thursday, July 06, 2006

7 Things...

I confess, I stole this from a random blog.

I think I will turn this into my own series, so if you want to know the 7's in my life, please send me topics to cover....

1. Become a wife.
2. Become a mother
3. Embrace my own sense of self
4. Travel to my ancestors homelands
5. Meet one famous person who has done something positive for this world
6. Spoil my hopefully future grandchildren
7. Tell my hopefully future husband "I love you" on our 50th anniversary

7 THINGS I CAN'T DO (yet?)
1. Fly a plane
2. Make money from my photography
3. Be debt free (got to love grad school loans)
4. Love 100% of myself 100% of the time
5. Give up comfort foods
6. Like Jeagermeister
7. Find a guy worth fighting for - I KNOW he is out there

7 BOOKS I READ OVER AND OVER ~ All of these books brought me from childhood to who I am now. They are STILL great reads, even tattered and yellowed with age.
1. Little Women
2. Eight Cousins
3. Pollyanna
4. All of A Kind Family (all 3 books)
5. A Little Princess
6. Nancy Drew (the originals - they were my mom's & they are in hard cover)
7. Jo's Boys
EMERGENCY BONUS UPDATE!!! - a fellow blogger reminded me about another series that I LOVE so this one gets a bonus 8th listing:
8. The entire Anne of Green Gables series


New day, Newish friends, New outlook on life....Sort of

Ok, so maybe not a fully new outlook...but this past evening (really wed. night, as it is now a very early thurs. morning) sure took my mind off the turd and the trainer. I have a few "groups" of friends. Some of which overlap. This is where they overlap.

As I mentioned "earlier" (what a relative term) today, I spent the day suffering from symptoms similar to those of a hangover - AND I DIDN'T EVEN DRINK yesterday. So after playing not-so-great aunt I came home and took a LONG NAP. And then woke up wide awake at 9pm. So I went to "the bar" and some of my new friends were there. And I proceed to get dissed by a chick!

Ok, not exactly, but I did. New friend "D" has been "seeing" (aka f*%$ing) Sara. Now, last night at the bonfire D told me he has been trying to break it off with her but she doesn't get it. In fact, she SO wants to be part of the group that she has tried sleeping with ALL of them.

I HAVE NEVER SLEPT WITH ANY OF THEM - sometimes, like last night there is inappropriate bantering... and my boobs have gotten more action than I can remember - but other than that it has been a mutual hands off situation

Now the guys are all playing this poker game, so I sit down at the table by Owner, he gives me a hug & a smacker on the lips (he is the closest thing i have to a brother) and I get hugs from some of the other guys.. and I am just quietly watching. Sara sits down by D. Then she leaves to go to a dance club and sends a text to D asking: "Who is the chick with owner?" See, she doesn't know that even though I don't normally show up on poker night, I am part of the "family" there.

So, we, being the evil bunch we are send back : "Owners new flavor of the week." Oh, btw, owner is married and I am friends with her TOO!

So Sara sends back: "He chose THAT over me???" Now, as is evident from past posts, my self confidence is somewhat lower & my weight is a little higher than the average chick, but tonight this doesn't even phase me - I actually laugh..

Now, here is where things get interesting: THE GUYS ARE PISSED. They actually stop play to discuss their course of action. They decided to not even dignify her catty comment with a response to her. But they also decide that they are going to tell her who I am and how she compares to me when she gets back.

They proceed to tell me that the thing that makes me so great is that of all the girls they know from the group, I have the best personality. Now, normally I would take "best personality" to mean nice girl, but we won't sleep with you. But these are guys I have known a long time, 3 are married guys & 6 are single. AND THEY STOPPED PLAYING POKER to tell me that they would rather hang out with me than any chick who would blow them in the back room anyday..... Maybe I'm wrong, but most guys I know wouldn't stop playing poker if a chick laid down on the table naked - but they stopped play for me.

My response was: "Guys, I'm fine with it. If you all knew the shit I've been going thru you would be even madder. Just let it go - she is insignifiant."

But they KEPT telling me how "great" I am & similar statements. So I finally I told them thank you.

And then Sara returned. And I just smiled to myself. And the guys proceeded to circle around me and they ignored her. I have NEVER garnered so much attention in my life.


So, maybe being single chick isn't so bad right now after all - because if a group of guys are going to give up an easy chick for me, I must be doing SOMETHING right.

Wednesday, July 05, 2006

Holiday Recap

For those of you following the dating saga... He is a turd. He "chickened out" and didn't show... oh yeah, and then "accidentally" sent a text to me that was meant for her... So I did what any girl in this situation would do - I accidentally fowareded it to everyone else when I ment to delete it. A bit passive aggressive - DEFINITELY, but can you REALLY BLAME ME? So now I am down to a slow boil of resentment...

but I digress from my true purpose here...

As we were setting up there was still a bit of rain, but then it passed...

Yesterday was a day of Good Fun, GREAT Food, Good & SAFE forwards - of the viewing kind, Great Friends, and the making of some new friends...

We hung out in the pool, had a potluck picnic, played w/ all the kids, none of the guys got hurt setting off the fireworks - some of which were REALLY REALLY good.... And had a GREAT bonfire....

And after the little ones went to bed, thoroughly inappropriate conversations that had me literally spraying my drink out of my mouth, tears rolling down my face, and almost peeing myself!!

I drank WAY too much Cherry Coke and stayed until the host went to bed at 4:30 am. I woke up feeling like I have a hangover, but I did NOT drink - but since I know I'm just dehydrated I've been drinking H2O since I got up....

The sun is out in full force today. So I am going to go play "aunt" to the 2 best kids in the world.

I hope you all were able to enjoy a great day yesterday too.

Tuesday, July 04, 2006

July 4th Extravaganza

I am not a big holiday girl. But there is something about the 4th that makes me happy.

As a little girl my parents used to take me to the local park and we would have a picnic while listening to the music in the band shell. And then we would lay back and enjoy the fireworks.

When I got older, I went to summer camp near my aunt and she would take me. Ironically she would take me to the same park my dad used to go to when he was a kid. Again, we would enjoy whatever show they put on, and then we would lay back again and watch the fireworks.

The most strange year was the year in college that I took summer classes and got pneumonia. I watched the fireworks from a hospital room WAY UP - they were just as cool to watch - but from a different view - I was looking across AT them.

The last few years I have spent this holiday with friends of various natures. We will potluck during the afternoon... Maybe swim... And light a bonfire... And instead of cramming into our cars and joining the masses in town for the big fireworks display, we will go across to the neighbors farm (yeah, she lives in the middle of nowhere) and watch the farmers fireworks show...

The difference now is that I get even more enjoyment out of watching all of the kids reactions than my own.

So no matter who you are, where you are, and who you are - or are not - with, I hope you have a fabulous day and can find the kid inside of you to enjoy the view.

Monday, July 03, 2006

Oh Crappy Day

So today seems to be a blah and crappy day for us all.

I feel it too.

Guy situations suck.

Great people are dying.

I keep crying - unable to stop them in private.

But I am the one all the others turn to in times of strife and struggle. So I bottle up my sadness, my issues, my tears, my pain.

My problems seem insurmountable to me, but everyone else seems to have a bigger problem so I bite my tongue.

The one person I want to call, I don't know if I can. Will he answer? If he doesn't is it because he screened the call or is he not home? If he does, is it because he wants to or because I made him feel guilty the other day? Is it even fair for me to call him to lay my sadness at his feet?

What to do when there is no one to turn to?


Sunday, July 02, 2006

Dating delusions

So, a friend of a friend introduced me to a guy a few months ago - NOT a blind date, just a bunch of people hanging out. So "guy" got my number, and called me. He went out of town, and he called me, he came back to town and I left town. And he called me.

So we went out. Just the 2 of us. It was fun. He picked me up, and I got a "WOW" when the door opened. He opened the car door, made sure the car temp was comfortable, held the door to the restaurant open. We were definitely both nervous. We laughed. We lingered over drinks and dessert.

He dropped me off, kissed me, and then he called me - ON HIS WAY HOME.

And then we fell back into a repeat of the pattern of trying to meet again and both of us having conflicts.

Or did we?

Now, I don't expect any man to be monogamous after a number of phone calls and one date. However, I would expect a guy to be a bit more careful when talking to me and dating others.

A couple nights ago, we talked. We made definite plans. We are going to go to fireworks on Tuesday together and the group party.

And then "guy" e-mails friend about the HOT CHICK he went on a date with the other night. Now this wouldn't be a problem, excecpt that friend forwards said e-mail to other buddy. Who e-mails it to his girlfriend, who happens to be MY friend. MY friend, then attempts to reply back to the guys with questions about her, and should she let me know since we are all supposed to be at fire works together.

but OOPS. The reply all button is hit instead. And the guys don't realize this so they all send her responses to her questions... And I get them too.

So now I know all about hot girl, and that no one is supposed to talk about her on Tuesday.

What is a girl to do????